Work With Me
Underneath all your internal noise, confusion, self-doubt, and anxiety—it’s just too damn much all the time, isn’t it?—there is a wise, grounded, trustworthy person waiting to meet you.
Okay, I see the look of disbelief on your face—“Man, WHAT are you smoking?!” But before you shake your head and close the browser, bear with me for just a second.
I get it. Your interior soulscape may feel nothing like what I’ve just described. Perhaps you’ve spent countless hours in the self-help aisle, scouring the web, or taking Change-Your-Life-Forever® programs. And the result has left you feeling even more discouraged. You're scared that this is now your life. Answers are for other people.
Lean in and listen carefully:
There's nothing wrong with you, even though all your evidence so far points in the other direction. You’re feeling stuck, but beating yourself up won’t get you moving any faster or farther.
And there is hope. Yes, for you.
I want to help you escape from the exhausting treadmill of your thoughts, worries, automatic scripts, and the well-worn patterns you have in your head—including your anxiety about all the stuff going on around you that you can’t control. I want to show you how to gain perspective and distance from that noise—even when it feels really loud—so that you can ground yourself, quiet the anxiety, reduce the whirring thoughts, and return to a place of calm.
It’s a way of operating from a more grounded, gentler, wiser, more compassionate part of your being—your “still point.” A place where you can exhale and be at ease and safe with yourself. Where you can finally chill the fuck out.
Because the world is always going to spin, but you don’t have to.
How does this work?
In short, we’re going on a journey together. And it’s different with every client, depending on your unique goals, challenges, history, wounds, aptitudes, and resources. As happens on every journey worth taking, you’ll get to stretch muscles that you’re not accustomed to using, you’ll take some risks, you'll stumble occasionally, and you’ll get a little dirty in the process.
And you’re going to get stronger.
The Nitty-Gritty
Typically, we’ll meet twice a month for in-person or online sessions, with email support in between. (Occasionally, depending on the need, we may meet more often, especially at the beginning.) These will be working sessions, focused on whatever phase of the journey we’re on. We’ll do a deep-dive check-in, assess progress, process/troubleshoot any issues that have come up, brainstorm next steps, and commit to new actions.
As you might expect, much of the real work happens between the sessions. To bring your vision to life, there will be practagreements. These might include reading, journaling, watching a movie, daily practices, and some real-life experimentation to help activate/embody the changes you’re wanting to create.
One of my superpowers, as clients and friends tell me, is my ability to create a safe container for exploring the really hard stuff, for surfacing the things that you’re afraid to look at and say out loud.
And that’s half the battle.
I'll be supporting you every step of the way. Whether it’s empathy you need, or inspiration, cheerleading, a shoulder to cry on, an ear to vent to, a hand up, a rope down, a gentle push, or a kick in the pants—count on me to be a strong advocate for your transformation. I'll be right beside you.
And while change can happen overnight, it’s quite the rarity. For this reason, I ask you to make a minimum four-month commitment to the process. It takes time to build trust, clarify goals, understand the motives behind the motives, break through your resistance, uncover your patterns (including the places that you hide out), and build new ways of being/thinking/moving through the world.
That sounds hard.
It’s really not. Especially when you measure it against the goal. The ability to quiet the noise and live with intention—from the inside out—has the potential to transform every facet of your life: your moment-to-moment sense of well-being, your relationships, your sense of purpose, your work, your play, your spirituality, and your ability to set and go for meaningful goals. And getting in touch with the root sources of your fear and hesitation will give you power over them.
Remember, we’re going for gold.
The still point is NOT about folding yourself into an eternal lotus position with a beatific smile permanently pasted on your face. Rather, it’s about discovering and nurturing a very special place within yourself:
A place of self-compassion, that fully appreciates the pain of being human and the scope of your personal journey, and that defaults to tenderness rather than self-attack.
A place where you are a better friend to yourself.
A place of open-eyed, radical self-acceptance—where you see and appreciate yourself, and are safe with yourself.
A place with room for all of you, including your unfinishedness, your messiness, your becomingness.
A place anchored in the knowledge of your fundamental worth, where you can recognize and own the riches already buried within you.
A place where your singularity and uniqueness are not scary.
A place where you can feel the power of finally making sense to yourself, by recognizing your own patterns and their origins. And the recognition that you can harness those same dynamics to shape your life in different ways.
A place where you feel safe enough to stretch your comfort zone, to lean into that pang of discomfort and play with the hard parts. Where you’re not afraid to leave the high pristine shelf of spiritual insight and get down into the grit and grime of the sandbox—the space that we actually live in.
A place where you can venture into new and sometimes scary territory without losing your connection to yourself, and that includes tools for encountering and assimilating the unexpected.
A place that is anchored in trust in your own resilience (including supporting habits and tools), so that even if you do lose the trail (or lose your shit), you have a reliable path for getting back on track.
A place that’s tilted towards growth—expanding your horizon, your sense of yourself, and the field of what’s possible. Where, as you begin to overcome your fears, you can breathe easier, you have room to stretch out, and you can survey the landscape without all your current anxiety. And as you scale hills and peaks along the way, your perspective shifts. You see new routes, new shortcuts, and even new destinations.
A place of hope in the possibility of lasting change and progress towards your dreams, in which you are continually pulled forward by the wonder of exploration and the growing confidence that comes from taking bold and imperfect action.
A place where you can appreciate that you are not a static being but rather a dynamic and always-unfolding process.
A place that serves as an inner base camp for your wild and restless magical adventures.
Most importantly, it’s a place where you can rest in that moment between the beats that allows you to more clearly hear the exquisite melody of life and join in The Dance.
Sound good? Then let’s talk. Contact me and we’ll schedule a relaxed, no-pressure conversation to see if this work is a good fit for you. Even if we decide it’s not, I’ll do my best to be of service during our time together. And I’ll bet there’s a thing or two we can learn from each other.
I’m looking forward to it.
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
A MUSE FOR MY LIFE GARDEN
This client—such a delight to accompany on this journey—uses a rich and resonant garden metaphor to describe the soulwork that we dug into together.
You were my Garden Muse in this spiritual sabbatical. You got down on your hands and knees across from me as I examined the earth and what was growing there. At first I could only see the weeds and thorny, mesquite suckers. You drew my attention to the bits of yellow, pink, and lavender peeking through the stickery stems, thirsty and straining for sunlight.
You helped me see the garden as a magical place with memories and dreams, joys and sorrows. You helped me, hand over hand, pull the buckets of water from the depths of my well, so I could moisten the soil and make the weeding easier. The progress in the garden was visible and provided the confidence I needed to make it even more beautiful.
You did not act as the "sage on the stage," telling me what to do or not to do. Instead, you were my "guide on the side,” helping me make the most of my Life Garden. Unlike previous work with psychologists and self-help books, you did not immediately focus on the painful and difficult parts (i.e., fixing what is "wrong"), but rather encouraged me to find the delicious and wonderful aspects of my being that I doubted or discounted (that is, finding what to nurture).
The work will never be done, but you showed me how to lean in and enjoy the process.
—Catherine Parker, Arizona
A life-changing Experience
Before working with Chris, I was spinning my wheels--professionally, personally, and in relationships. I was filled with anxiety and self-doubt, and was experiencing constant “analysis paralysis,” which inevitably led to poor decision-making that perpetuated the cycle. Finally, I reached a point at which I was done being stubborn and telling myself "this will just pass."
Working with Chris was supportive, exciting, and at times tough: the experience was a true confidence-builder and life-changer. Through it, I gained a more actualized sense of myself and what I want to do in life. I started taking action on specific steps and telling myself that I was more than capable and to stop making excuses. I also was able to better address relationships that I was in and be honest about which ones were working for me and which ones weren't. I gained the tools to deal with so many of the issues that we all struggle with in life.
My experience with Chris was incredibly powerful. I left every meeting feeling lighter and more confident in myself, and that led to real results in my day-to-day life.
—Clay Sutherland, Houston, TX
